BF2013: Today Was All About...

Shopping
Hanging out with my bestie
Visiting with family
Welcoming my girl home
Lively and heart repairing discussions
God filling my heart with even more love and peace and clarity than I imagined

All in all, a day well spent

Paula xoxo

What Is Love?

Love is a verb.

It is a doing word that requires action.

Jesus set the ultimate example of this by dying on the cross for our sins.

Words are like the wind.

Spoken and then gone if there is no action behind them.

Being told that I’m loved and having minimal action to back it up has been a recurring event during my adult life.

Yes, I love you. Yes, I do.

But did you? No, because your actions showed me otherwise.

Yes, I love you. Yes, I will do this for you.

But did you? No, because your actions showed me otherwise.

Yes, I love you. Yes, I want to spend the rest of my life with you.

But did you? No, because your actions have showed me, and continue to show me, otherwise.

So now the door is closed. This last time was the last time. Ever. Forever. Never again.

This year has been filled with turmoil. Emotional. Spiritual. Physical. Mental.

God has reminded me of His goodness, however, by those that both say I love you and show I love you.

The friend who lends me money when I scrape the bottom of my single parent barrel on occasions.

The friend who looks after my daughter, cleans my house and cooks me meals.

The friend who drives 45 minutes to attend a doctor’s appointment with me.

This is “I love you”. This is showing me that I am actually special, and not just one of many.

No financial barriers.

No family situation barriers.

No geographical barriers.

This is love. This is action. This is showing me that you do really care.

"Single Moms Have Real Families Too!"

Chere over at "A Single Christian Mom's Advice on Making Life Easier" raises a valid point in this post of what constitutes a real family - http://asinglechristianmomsadvice.blogspot.com.au/2012/04/single-moms-have-real-families-too.html.

I am a single mum and I have a real family. There may only be two of us in the house, but we - my daughter and I - are a family. We don't have a husband/dad on the scene, and there are no other children/siblings in the house. Does that make our lives and how we live it any less important than a how a family with a husband/dad and children/siblings do? No, it doesn't.

One of the struggles I've encountered as a single mum is that some of society look at us differently. Not just as women who are raising children, but as women who don't have a husband. And somehow parts of society seem to put us in a different category. The "not a real family" category. The "she's just after a husband" category. The "it's not a real home" category.

Well, I'm sorry society, but you are wrong. I am a woman raising a child (and quite well, I might add). I am a woman who now chooses not to have a man in my life for the benefit of both my child and myself. I am a woman who is bringing up a family. I am a woman who is raising her child in a real home.

I love my life with my daughter. There are times when it would be good to have a husband to now the lawns, wash the car, and take care of the "man stuff'. But, in the meantime, I do that.

We function well as a family. There may be only two of us, but we are just that - a real family.

Paula xo

I Just Can’t Keep Going ... or Can I?

Last Saturday was a classic example of taxing myself beyond my limits. I had been given a lawn mower a month or so ago, but due to recovering from a sprained neck I haven’t been able to use it. But I changed that!

At approximately 9am I was outdoors and prepping the mower ... and myself! Aside from a few hiccups with the catcher and too much dense grass in one patch of my lawn for the mower to handle, I did a great job, and so did the mower! Yes, it took a couple of hours but I got it done!

After the lawn mowing I hosed down my back patio and put some laundry on. Then I got to rest in a hot bath and lay down for a little while before helping my daughter wash the car. Or more correctly ... washing the car after the novelty wore off for her!

But I overdid it! The lawn mowing took everything out of me! The sense of accomplishment I gained from doing the lawns boosted my spirits but the pain after was a bit too much to bear. But this is how it is for a me: a single mum and an aches and pains sufferer!

Pushing on. Going on even when you want to stop. Dealing with a daughter who is a social butterfly while only wanting to be a hermit crab. I do often wonder what lessons God has in all this for me!

After Saturday I realise that the lesson is to s-l-o-w d-o-w-n and pace myself. To stop and smell the roses – or in my case, enjoy my 7 year old daughter – and be happy with how things are, even if the lawn looks like silage waiting to be cut and bailed!

Being a single mum, working full-time, living over 2000 kilometres (1370 miles) away from my family, and suffering from physical and mental health issues, I find life a tad difficult at times. But praise be to God that it’s not as difficult as some people experience. If I was not a Christian, and if I didn’t have friends and family living near, I often wonder if I’d be where I am now.

James 1:27 (NIV) talks about how Christians are “... to look after orphans and widows in their distress”. My daughter is not an orphan, but she does not have a father present in our home at all. I am not a widow, but I do not have a partner (and actually feel that I never really have had even in past relationships). And this is why God calls for the church to look after orphans and widows. God’s ideal scenario for children is for them to grow up in a loving home with Christian parents. It doesn’t always happen, as was the case with me, but when it does, it’s beautiful.

So, I can keep going on. I can learn the lessons that God is teaching me. I may make those lessons difficult at times, but it I keep learning and keep pressing on, then life will always get better! That’s what He wants for us anyway!

Always look forward. Always take into account your limitations. Always rely on God!

On Being Thankful...

It's nearing the end of Thursday here in Australia (and nearing the end of a very strange week), so I thought I'd hop on the Thankful Thursday bandwagon and let you know that despite the stress of my current situation, I am very thankful...

I am thankful that my work has been mayhem today as it's kept my mind from wandering and wondering.

I am thankful that God's presence and arms of comfort have been wrapped around me, protecting me from the fear I feel.

I am thankful that I took measures to counteract what was inevitably going to be a dive in emotions (let alone seratonin!).

I am thankful that I can finally be myself as I journey on a new path in my life.

All in all, I am just thankful. I am tired, emotionally drained, nauseaous at the prospect of my life ahead, but overall I am thankful.

Thank You Heavenly Father, thank You for my daughter, my family and my friends, my work colleagues, my Sisters in Christ, my blog friends, and my doctor! But most of all, thank You for YOU...for being such an important part of my life and for leading me where you know I am to go. In Jesus' Wonderful Name, Amen

The Weekend That Was...

I have had a whirlwind weekend with a trip to pick my girlie up from her dad's, shopping, movie and pizza night, a birthday party/picnic, and a visit from my brother. I am done ... toast ... exhausted, as is Jasmine, who is sleeping soundly in the next room. I had meant to do a post for Yes To God Tuesday (I am behind!), so I will do a double-whammy on that during the week. Tomorrow marks the return to a somewhat normal existence again with work for me and vacation care for Jasmine. So, as I am loving life, loving the challenges it brings, and loving the lessons I'm learning, here is a photo of my brother Jamie, Jasmine and myself this evening to share.

Two Sleeps To Go...

Hi to my blogland friends!

I thought I'd drop in and say hi before I knuckle down and really get ready for my holiday to Tasmania. The above photo is of me, of course, and behind/above me is the Brisbane Eye. It was set up for the 20th anniversary of Expo '88 and is set to hang about at Southbank for a while yet. I'm going to have a ride on it with Jasmine after we return from our trip.

Speaking of, the last week or more has been a tough couple for me, so I'd like to ask if you could say a prayer for me for not only a safe journey for Jasmine and I to Tasmania, but also that I can be relieved of the heavy burdens that I seem to be carrying at present.

Being a solo parent to a very switched on 4 and a half year old, plus working full-time, living away from a family support network, and also feeling the strain of a long distance relationship, I seem to be a tad overwhelmed of late. I know that God is looking after me, but I also know that I must rely on Him more for my strength. I cannot do it alone.

So until I post next, keep safe and know that you will all be in my thoughts.

Blessings...

Last night I sat and perused blog pages and realised, as I shut up shop to go to bed, that I am blessed! I am blessed not only by the fact that I am one of God's Girls, but that through His provision He has connected me with so many of His other Girls in the world that I need never feel that I'm doing life alone again!

To add to these blessing is the fact that I live with one of God's Little Girls in the shape of my daughter Jasmine, who was born to one parent who should have known better and to another parent who thought he did. Thank the Lord for the opportunity for the sinner to be forgiven of the sin, yet still loved!

Another blessing is my sweetie who came back into my life after a 17 year absence just over 3 years ago, and who enhances my life even though we are separated by many miles! God has a plan, and we both love Him enough to know this and follow what He wants us to do.

More blessings keep popping into my head; the fact that I have a full-time job and am a valuable member of my workplace. The fact that I am part of a family, who, although we deal with our dysfunctional aspects in the best way we can, love each other and will do so always.

My extended family is a blessing; my aunts, uncles, cousins, "adopted" family members. The people who I grew up with and who are just like family. The friends I have made over the years, and especially the friends who have stuck by me through thick and thin, accept me for who I am - faults and all! And especially the friends who will, at the drop of a hat, come running to help me when I feel that the world is crashing down around me.

My church family, who, although I don't see them as much as I should, I join every Sunday to worship our Father and thank Him for the gift of His Son so that we can live the joyous, happy and free lives that we live. I'm also blessed with wonderful pastors at church who guide and instruct me from God's Word with their insightful sermons!

I have been blessed recently by the gift of cyberspace, where I have not only made contact with people whom I haven't seen in too many years to count (go Facebook!), but I have also met and formed friendships with ladies whom I would never have met otherwise (go Blogger!). Ladies who, although I have never met them in real life and may never get the chance to prior to getting to heaven, have touched my life and provided me with such words of comfort, love and encouragement that I can do nothing else other than love them as Sisters in Christ always and forever!

I have been blessed by two particular Sisters in Christ through cyberspace, and one is my dear friend Carmen whom I met via Yahoo nearly 2 years ago. She is an absolute treasure and delight and provides such warmth even just from her smile! The second is the lovely Lelia, who through her openness and sheer delight in loving the Lord has helped open up a whole new world of hope and discovery in the Lord for me. We have all journeyed on similar paths on our lives and I know that is why God made our paths cross now.

A mixture of blessings here for me, and what a wonderful mixture it is! I am blessed all around. Everywhere I look from right in front of me - to every coastline here in Australia, to the other side of the world, and amazingly to nearly every part of the world now; America, South Africa, the United Kingdom, Trinidad and Tabago, Norway and Canada - I can see blessings!

I am truly blessed, and thankful to my wonderful Lord for providing me with such blessings! He has sent me my showers of blessing! Thank you Lord!

“I will bless them and the places surrounding my hill. I will send down showers in season; there will be showers of blessing.” – Ezekiel 34:26